Another de-aged Danny au, but he’s with Dan & Ellie & Jazz as well.
Jason has like just arrived back to Gotham, caused chaos in the underbelly due to well, 8 heads in a duffle bag, and is just starting his takeover of Crime Alley. It’s going good, great even! And then he busts some sort of gang or smuggling ring run by people in white suits and there’s… holy shit why do these four toddlers have Lazarus eyes?!
Is that a lab?! And Lazarus waters?! Jason might be a bit mad but he’s not an asshole, he’s not going to just leave these kids here to the streets. He can’t just take them to the Batclan either, and as much as he begrudgingly trusts Talia, he sure as fuck doesn’t trust Ras. Who knows what he’d do to four… what are they, pit-kids?
Now he’s juggling his whole revenge-thing, running a criminal empire, taking over Gotham’s underbelly, and being a single dad. At least the goonion seems to be down for helping, seeing as he’s making Crime Alley safer…? …. Fuck he needs some proper sleep
The goons become “uncle”/“auntie”[goon name] and share responsibility for watching the kids. The older two are complete opposites while the twins will bicker in their baby twin language but react similarly to things.
Dan and Jazz can talk but Jazz is better at it, Dan would rather act than talk. Danny and Ellie/Dani can say some words and short phrases but nothing big yet. All four of them can understand the twin speak but it’s mostly the twins who use it, the goons think it’s the cutest thing! (It’s actually ghost speech but it’s not as scary when it’s baby)
Jason likes to be the one to cook for them, they all seem so excited about food and it makes Jason feel like a good parent even if he still wishes he could spend more time with them. It’s also concerning that Dan and Jazz expect the food to bite back at first, what was that weird cult/trafficking ring doing to these kids!?!
Jason was seriously reconsidering his plans. Not the take over crime ally and kill the competition parts, no he was reconsidering the whole “death the living shit out of his replacement so he stops being Robin/a child soldier” part.
He’s not even sure how Jazz found out about his plan but she is giving him Alfred’s patented raises eyebrow and looking at him like he is an idiot. Jazz apparently did not think blaming Tim for becoming Robin wasn’t healthy, especially since A. They don’t know the situation that led Tim to become Robin. B. Jason replaced Dick, if Jason got mad he would be a hypocrite. And C. All beating Tim would do would keep him out the hero game until he recovered, after that he would probably double down on the vigilantism. Jason hated it when Jazz was right, how could a 5 year old be so smart.
At least Jordan is on his side, the little terror is all for bathing in the blood of his enemies (he hasn’t seen a kid this blood thirsty since he babysat Talia’s demon spawn). He however did think that making Bruce kill Joker, while poetic, would be chickening out. Jordan thought Jason should kill his own killer.
Wes didn’t think Jason should do anything drastic until he confirmed all the facts. All Jason had was Talia and Ra’s word things happened the way he thought they happened. Jason had to admit Wes had a point, damn why where five year olds so smart.
Well dang now you got me thinking about him just slowly amassing the whole class and trying to tell himself he in fact does not have an adoption problem. It’s not his fault that this weird cult-trafficking ring keeps settling down in his turf, right? They even keep coming after him and his kids spouting utter nonsense and he thinks they might just be completely insane or brainwashed. Like him, he can see himself as a ‘ghost’ or something, but c'mon, the kids? Obviously some sort of metas or even half-humans, who he shall be protecting. And if the Goonion think that maybe Red Hood is something similar and that they need to protect him, well Jason doesn’t need to know.
I am loving that you casually added Dash to this whole thing. Allow me to add more fuel to Dan’s Fire by adding the A-Listers and there powers.
Dash (4) has physical stats are slightly better than anyone with certain radius. Depending on who is around him he could be the best athlete in school or slightly out pace the flash
Paulina (4)is a dragon shifter, the more enraged she becomes the more dragon like she is.
Kwan (4) can duplicate himself and has mild empathy.
Star (4) is able to pick up WiFi signals like a satellite, she knows all the gossip.
Hell let’s just add every body.
Jordan (6) canon abilities
Jazz (5) has enhanced intellect, high empathy
Wes (5) is a clear sighted mortal (Look up on PJO fandom). He sees the truth in all situations but unfortunately his powers come with the Cassandra affect, people who don’t know have a hard time believing it.
Danny (4) canon abilities
Ellie (3) canon abilities
Sam (4) Urban Jungle abilities
Tucker (4) King Tuck abilities plus technopathy
Valerie (4) can summon her suit and weapons.
Let’s not forget Kyle lol Kyle would have a similar ability to Wes, but it’s to hide secrets. If he denies something, then well, no one will believe it. He does believe in ghosts, how could he not, but there is that saying of ignorance is bliss. But come the GIW… yeah people need to start believing his brother Wes, or at least his classmates do. The GIW doesn’t need to know shit and he’d really appreciate this muzzle off his face along with an explanation on what happened to make all of them between the ages of 4 and 6.
Then an adult liminal (the closest they ever got was their teacher Mr Lancer and even then he was barely ghostly) comes into the lab guns blazing! At first he even wondered if Jason was a ghost with how slightly delirious he was, but he’s not complaining when he and his brother get scooped up and whisked out of the place. Apparently the others have similarly gotten rescued from the labs by this (understandably) spitting mad liminal. Oh wait, he’s like Danny but slightly corrupted? And their presence helps him not go into a rage? Well shit man, get this dude some snuggles pronto!
Jason loves his not-kiddos (no Bob he is not there father) and the Goonion is always down to babysit but these kids definitely need socialize with people who aren’t criminals, preferably children there own age. This begins Jason’s search for a daycare center.
Unfortunately for him the Gotham daycares are not equipped to handle so many metas at once. They have gotten kicked out of every daycare they’ve been to so far for a variety of reasons
Danny made snow in July. Inside the building.
Ellie kept melting to scare her teachers.
Dan set fire to the cubbies when the teacher tried to make him take a nap
Jazz caused the principal to cry and reconsider all her life choices.
Sam lead the civilian children in a protest to free the class hamster.
Tucker rick rolled the entire staff when they took away his tablet.
Valerie kept stealing the security guards guns.
Dash so thoroughly crushed the gym teachers fragile adult ego the man started abusing steroids during school hours
Paulina cut off a girls pigtails with her claws.
Kwan duplicated, that’s all he did.
Star kept eavesdropping on her teachers phone calls and revealing their dirty laundry. 
Wes revealed his nursery aide was running drugs out of the back room.
Kyle kept making the teachers forget he existed so he could have extended nap time.
Jason is reaching his wits end. These kids need some normal socialization. He tries to think of how all the kid supers he knew made friends and unfortunately came to a chilling realization.
He was going to have to find more super kids.
Honestly I find it hilarious with how much the Batfam are watching him they haven’t realized that it’s Jason. Then again at 15 Jason was closer to a 12 year old in size while as an “adult’ he’s like 6’+ and probably around 300lbs and built like a fridge lol- who would expect it?
Jason doesn’t know whether to be exasperated by histhe kids or scold them, because like, they did do good. But still, they can’t be watched by the goonion all the time and he’s trying to keep them out of the whole crime-vigilante lift. Little does he know it’s too late, his kids have found a metal bat or five and are trying to relearn how to shoot with pudgy kid hands. The nerf guns help with practicing aiming.
He is struggling to find fellow powered people in Gotham. … (Though if this is before the We Are Robin movement, he could run into Duke and his friends. Duke wasn’t the only one with powers, though it might’ve depended on the world, with Riko being able to replicate other powers via touch and Daxton having both pyro- and hydro-kinesis) (The We Are Robin gang could be their babysitters at some point lol)
One of Red Hood rivals uses the power of memes for evil and discovers that Peter Jayson is the lover of Red Hood and the teen father of 13 kids under 6.
Said bad guy decides to take the daycare the kids are currently going to hostage in order to blackmail Red Hood
The villain and his gang where expecting to fight Red Hood, not his meta lover who fights like a Bat with a kidnapped Robin.
Tucker totally records the fight on his tablet and it goes viral.
How was Tucker supposed to know that the bats would recognize Jason’s fighting style.
They recognize it as Jason’s style but it’s different enough that they don’t immediately assume it’s him. After all Jason wasn’t a meta.
Red Hood on the other hand… Those jokes about being half dead are starting to make way more sense.
Ellie is freaking out the goonion by melting and pretending to be a mud mask, only to reveal herself when she reforms off poor Bills face.
Star is doing everyone’s nails in the most popular styles, she is looking up patterns and how to videos as paints.
Paulina and Sam are arguing over what pattern they should give Jason’s nails. The goons are joining the debate of sparkleishous v badass.
The merry men have found Kwan is very good at back rubs, especially when their are multiple of him.
Jazz has giant headphones on and is blasting the zen music as high as it can go so she can ignore her monkeys and their circus.
Valerie and Tucker are getting their hair done by their neighbor Elaine Thomas who is trying to teach that poor white boy next door how to properly care for kinky hair.
Danny is painting Duke’s nails while babbling about starlight and black holes.
Dash is curled up on the couch while watching the newest romcom.
Dan is pretending he doesn’t enjoy being pampered by the goons.
Kyle is applying a mud mask to Wes’s face and hoping the mud isn’t Ellie this time.
Nightwing is low key jealous he can’t join in and is wondering where Red Hood is.
Jason is almost offended, because Nightwing just crashed their Self-Care night that the Goons have been looking forward to all month. Hell, he was looking forward to all month!
Honestly Nightwing stumbled across the warehouse on accident and decided to use the chance he was given. The Merry Men are pissed because they finally got their teen-dad crime boss to join in on the bi-weekly self-care sessions and take a break from working! And this vigilante- not even one of the ones from their city but Bludhaven’s- is just going to crash it?!
The kids all tensed. They could feel how conflicted their Not-Dad was. Nightwing was upsetting him! It was family night! No! Not on! If he upsets him even more they are gonna make him leave!
Jazz: We don’t want you here. Go away!
Star: Yeah! It’s pampering night!
Dan: I can bite him!
Goon: Only if he don’t leave soon. Don’t know where he’s been kiddo.
Nightwing: Hey! Rude!
Ellie: No no. Vigilantes get thrown in dumpsters. Uncle is right!
bonus points if due to an attack from the condiment king, Nightwing smells like mustard and ketchup
Danny sniffs the air, and pins Nightwing with a stare.
Danny: You smell like sweat and burger sauce. Don’t bite him. It would taste nasty.
Nightwing: Do you have to be so mean about it?
Goon: What, ya sayin ya want ta get bit by the kid what can bite through steel?
Nightwing:…… He can WHAT?!?!?
Ellie grins and picks up a fork. Holds eye contact and starts to crunch down. Nightwing is in fact, very intimidated. Wow. Yeah. That’s, that’s a very good deterrent.
Nightwing: ….. Did you teach her to do that or?
Jazz: Please just go away! Or I’ll bite you. It supposed to be relaxation night! And you’re making Dad sad!
Nightwing decided that…. Yeah. Leaving is probably for the best.
All of the kids are getting head pats from the goons and extra cookies as they fuss over their teen crime boss because this is their teen, the bats can fuck off now. Their child and grandkids now!
Jason, once he stops having a mini breakdown is going to start cracking up in laughter. If anyone got a picture of his face they get a bonus because it was hilarious.
Less hilarious is that the bats keep trying to bother him about… him? Okay wait that is hilarious and if he doesn’t tell them anything then the robins will be in his territory more often where they’ll be safe. No more dead robins on their watch!
Ok. The kids? Absolutely know Papa Hood hates child heroes. They won’t be going out to find trouble. However? If trouble comes to them? That’s different. They are willing to defend. But Papa Hood doesn’t deserve the heart attacks of them running off to fight crime.
However. Kidnapping Robin? Absolutely a different ball game. Papa Hood doesn’t like that Robin is tiny. So… They scheme.
Jason? Gets back to his house and finds Robin chained by the ankle to a post. With the kids having fed him. And made him play games. Robin is obviously NOT amused. Jason? Is trying so hard not to laugh at how pissed he looks.
Jason: So…. Where’d you find the Robin?
Kwan: Batman let him patrol alone!
Star: He’s hardly bigger than us! So we brought him home!
Jason: Ok. But you gotta let him leave soon. It’s nearly Sun up.
Danny: Can’t we adopt him?
Jason: Batman might actually go insane if we steal his bird. Let him go.
Robin:…… You didn’t tell them to do this!?!?!
Jason now has the incredibly hard task of convincing his gremlins to let Tim go without revealing who he is. Or that he’s the same as his civilian cover Peter. The only good thing is that he hasn’t dropped out of ghost-form yet so he’s still as Hood, so the kids can’t try and go intangible or invisible. On the other side he really wants to just hold his kids and sleep because there was another issue with the goons wearing white in his territory, and he is still getting used to this whole halfa thing. Great.
Jason just sighs deeply. Wishes he could run his temples properly through his helmet.
Jason: Let the baby bird go. Or no dessert for a week.
Robin: What even the fuck. You’re Peter’s partner! For real!
Jason: You shush. Also, they’re right. You’re way too small to be going out in tights.
Robin: Hey! That’s not fair! I can’t help being small!
Danny: Papa also means young!
Jason: Count of three. Three. Two.
Frantic dive and Ellie phases the chain off Robin. Who just looks vaguely offended and confused.
Robin: There kids are smaller than me! And they stopped a gang fight!
Dan: The other option was getting shot by not stopping the fight.
Jazz: We don’t look for crime to stop! Or wear stupid costumes!
Tim splutters in outrage as the kids start teasing him about his Robin suit. Jason slowly moved him so he is out of the house. And then looks at his kids.
Jason:…. Are you trying to get an older brother or something?
Paulina: He doesn’t have good adults! He needs a good adult!
Poor Tim is going to look so haunted (hah) when he’s reunited with a very fussy Batfam since his tracker was getting heavy interference. They lost one Robin before they don’t want it to happen again.
What the kids are not mentioning to him is the Ghostly Urge to Throw Down. Sure the thugs weren’t liminal, but this is still their Papa’s territory which makes it their territory too! You threaten one of them you threaten all of them!
Bruce and Alfred fussing over Tim as he replays the scene in his head.
Tim: I’m missing something obvious! I just know it!
Bruce: But, you are ok? No one hurt you???
Tim: The kids decided I need a better parent. And apparently Peter with his 13 meta kids is good enough?? I dunno. It was weird.
Alfred: Perhaps sleeping on it will help, Master Tim. You have been fed at least.
—–
Red Hood: And why did no one stop the kids from giving them the beat down from hell???
Good: Uh, Boss? I dunno if you know this. But! YOU are the only one that can control your brats. Like, we love em. But they are hellions!
Yeah Tim is not going to let this go.
Tim has found a mystery and he is going going to solve it.
Cue Tim stalking Peter and his kids and Jason getting a weird sense of Deja Vu
Day Four of Reconnaissance.
Observing Peter (Last name unknown) and his children still feels oddly familiar. I am almost certain there is something obvious I have missed. More observation may clear up the issue.
Tim is going to be in the middle of patrol and these kids are just going to be tossing snacks at him and trying to pspsps him over without alerting their dad. Or leaving the Alley because he’d be so worried if they left his Haunt! Sure they’re causing the goons to nearly cry with worry too but they can’t just leave the kid alone, even if technically he’s older than them. It’s hard to remember they were older sometimes, which should be concerning but here feels so much safer than the Before. They’re sure it’s fine.
They didn’t mean to make things worse for their Dad! Honest! It’s just that the Robin was so small! And tired! And hungry! And Papa worried about him anyways. And they wanted to help! They end up agreeing to set up caches of food instead. With notes, and drinks. Mark them all with the Robin symbol. So the baby bird still has food. But they aren’t out making Papa have a heart attack.
You know who he should hire to help guard the daycare? Waylon Jones, Killer Croc. Like at the point of Red Hood, he’s trying to get out of the rogue business and even half-sponsored Roy to get help with his drug troubles. He’s big, intimidating, and not afraid to use violence even if he doesn’t want to. He has a reputation. But the kids would love him. Paulina alone would absolutely adore him, and would be delighted to have a scale buddy.
Tim will find a way to get those samples, somehow. If that means (ugh) letting the kids kidnap him again to make sure he’s practicing 'self care’ then fine. It’s a sacrifice he’ll have to make. He is… rather concerned that apparently their current babysitter is Killer Croc. But that’s mostly an awkward 'hi I’m one of the kids who have kicked in your teeth before please don’t mind me here yep’.
Waylon? Honestly having such a good time. He gets paid well, has a proper home that’s not just the sewers, and the kids are tough enough that he doesn’t have to worry about him hurting them because they’re so small. They’re not fragile by any means, but he was worried at first that he’d accidentally do something.
Jason is just relieved to be able to take a fuckin nap, as are the Merry Men.
Waylon has heard all about plan adopt the Robin. So seeing the poor kid get dragged into the middle of a cuddle pile? Highly amusing. Is it weird seeing a Robin not kicking ass? Yeah. It sure fuckin is. But! This one is tiny. Even smaller than the last. He can see why the brats are worried.
The ghostly urge to Throw Down has hit. Jason is a nesting halfa who up until now hasn’t exactly encountered a powerful ghost, all he knows is that this thing is powerful and dangerous and in his Haunt. No he doesn’t know how the fight started, nor when he shifted to his ghost form. Honestly he hadn’t gotten hit by Pit Rage in so long he nearly forgot what it felt like, even if that’s not exactly what happened.
According to the kids he’s now friends with the eldritch shadow knight??? Ghost… Pit Demon… thing????
reading through all of this … one thought hit me like a truck.. the reason why no one outside of the merry men and the goonion know that peter and red hood are the same person is DEFINITELY because of kyle and wes. they definitely worked together to hide that fact from everyone else and the result? evryone thought red hood and peter were a couple instead. They also helped make sure no one could connect red hood or peter to jason.
also Tim can’t just go to their home to investigate without an invite or a guide because of Kyle’s, star’s,and tucker’s influence. if he tries to find any online record? MAJOR interference. practically untraceable. if he tries to sneak back himself? strange he could have sworn taking a right here would lead to another street not a dead end? didnt he just come from this direction? boom back to the edge of crime alley.
The kids let Tim take the DNA on purpose in order to set the bats sight on the GIW. Jasons dna is corrupted and seems to be almost an exact match with the substance from the giw labs. Well they can make sure jason and his new family are safe before trying to connect with them. and ensure their safety they will. I dont know who would target the giw harder. Bruce or Dick? In Dick’s case, he probably has a lot of regret (and pent up anger). Like Little wing?! he’s back? hes ALIVE?!… he’s being HUNTED!! GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY B.
Bruce? has a LOT of conflicting emotions he’s not competent enough to deal with. Time to abolish some laws and bring down the organization.
when tim wakes up? he asking for an autograph from his favorite robin.
They have to double-check the reports several times to confirm that yes, Jason and Peter are the same person, and no, it isn’t three separate people. But the fact that there’s some sort of mental fuckery going on is very concerning to all of them and definitely not making them calmer about the situation.
Freshman Year Jace telling Porter that he needs to chill because he sounds creepy as fuck, and than he’s just like - Portet chill, we don’t have to be friends but we are coworkers chill out man
It’s kinda funny and a bit sad considering the Junior Year… he wasn’t always evil…
Also the absolute comedy of Porter walking into that ruined cafeteria on the first day of school year, demonic runes everywhere and hes like for fucks sake, who is doing another evil plot? It was supposed to be my evil plot time now i have to delay it (code of honour for villains makes him respect the other villain who started first lol)
I just realized that Gilear is the only competent parent in that household. Aside from Cathilda, who for sure raised Fabian more than his own mother did. But in terms of “default” parental figures, Gilear is the only one who is going to fully show up and be ready.
Telemaine has an entire world to learn about; you put that baby in granpapa’s arms and tell him you just need an hour, you’re getting a call from the cops telling you they found your baby with a strange man buying lotto tickets at a 7/11.
Hallariel is in no shape or form fit to raise another child. And I can see a world where we get some long overdue development in her character and relationship with Fabian, where she comes to understand what a shit mother she’s been, but she’s gonna fumble the bag a lot until then.
And you know Cathilda is gonna be doing a lot of the pushing in that department. It’ll worry her to let go of the reigns on such a young child, but the satisfaction at seeing Hallariel’s face when she goes to pawn off the baby and Cathilda refuses will be more than enough to reassure her that this has to happen.
So that just leaves… Gilear. A fully capable parent who already raised one kid, and who is still a prominent figure in that child’s life. It’s Gilear in the midst of caring for a newborn whilst Telemaine has Alston declaring his own nemesis, Hallariel panics on the sudden lack of Cathilda, and Fabian furthers his elaborate scheme to kill this baby as he stubbornly fights the slow creepings of affection.
“oooh fabian seacaster is definitely his father’s son after he threatened to skin ivy and turn her into a rug for insulting mazey <3” as if that’s not such a fucking cathilda the black move right there. have yall really forgotten “that’s right i’m a maid :3 and as such i could tell you that i’ve got all the breadcrumbs ready and all the spices and seasonings and a nice lemon wedge for when i turn your fuckin’ face into a plate of calamari.”
that’s not a “son of bill seacaster” threat that’s a “son of cathilda ceíli” threat and yall better give her the credit she DESERVES
the parallels between how poc are treated and how animals are treated in nope (2022) was perfect. one of the first scenes in the movie is when oj is on set for a commercial, and i was immediately as uncomfortable as he was. when he introduces himself to the white actress, she looks scared of him because his name is oj. she sees a black man with that name and can’t hide her inner thoughts. then the pa guy is confused as to where the “older one” is, clearly giving the message that he doesn’t trust oj to be a competent person. the pa sees him as an untrained boy, and doesn’t listen when oj tried to tell him not to look in the horse’s eyes. then when em explains the story of the first moving picture, we see that the black jockey and the horse aren’t even on the same level. people talk about the horse, but they don’t know anything about the man riding it.
then, there’s jupe and the gordy the chimp. jupe was a child star in a western comedy, and the poster itself gave me the wrong feeling. jupe and the unnamed black child actor he starred with were so clearly being used as a spectacle. it made me think of blazing saddles, how the idea of a black sheriff is absurd and funny. however, blazing saddles uses that as commentary and as a way to send a message, while in nope, we see that jupe was the victim of a film industry that tokenized him. then, with the chimpanzee, we see that same tokenization. a sitcom of a white family that includes an asian child and a chimp. it’s clear that both are meant to be equally funny; an asian kid is just as absurd as a chimp in human clothes and a birthday hat.
then, when we see him try to use the alien to create the same spectacle he was a part of in his youth, he realizes far too late that he’s made a mistake. that you can’t rely on an animal. his wife makes a comment about how working with trained animals is unpredictable, and we see in his eyes that he knows what’s about to happen. he put his trust in the behavior of a wild animal and now he’s paying the price and feeling the same fear he felt as a child.
I saw a post talking about how too many people ship steddie and that they have basically nothing in common. So what? It’s a fantasy show with fictional characters. People are allowed to use their imagination and create a scenario. The ship is unrealistic? Besties, we’re talking about a show about a girl with mind powers fighting monsters from another dimension, we can have a little fun with it.
